Saturday, 24 July 2010

not to be.

Had a visit from child's sw and family finder this week. A long 4 hours in total preceded by manic cleaning tidying and finishing off some decorating. Tempers got a little frayed but on the day all was fine. The visit went well but at the end we decided that even if offered, we would say no to the link. I won't detail too much here, but there were several issues that for us were not clarified and contact in particular had us worried. We felt it was being pushed less for the child and more for the birth family but that was only one thing. We must have been giving some ambiguous or slightly negative body language as the next day we were told that they had decided to go with another family visited a couple of weeks earlier, so in the end our decision was the right one. On reflection it is hard to say what the problem was other than our instincts were telling us that this was a lovely child, just not our child. So the search continues, but with no sense of disappointment and some learning of the process under our belts.

Friday, 9 July 2010

but actually........

We may not have lost out after all. Bonnie rang at the end of last week to say that although the child's sw had visited the other family, they still wanted to meet us as well so a date has been set for when Bonnie gets back from holiday. Still a 50:50 chance we won't be chosen, but looking at things positively, there must be enough about us to like if ,having met another family, they still want to meet us. So now we have a definitive deadline for finishing the kitchen and dining room. BIL is working like a trojan and doing a fantastic job, it just makes you want to continue with the whole house. Unfortunately Mr Bank Manager would object to that and with uni fees looming for Flip it really is a case of having to save up before doing stuff, rather than relying on the little plastic friend!

Sending lots of hugs and good vibes to Minnie and Micky who should hear the outcome of their family finder visit very soon. And huge congratulations to Donald and Daisy who have had a successful matching panel and will be meeting their new little duckling in a few very short weeks.

Thursday, 1 July 2010

probably lost out...

Having talked it through we decided to say yes, we are interested in the child whose details we received last week. Their sw was also happy with our PAR so we arranged a provisional date for week beg. 20th July after Bonnie's holiday. Bonnie got a call back at the end of last week to say they wanted to meet us one day this week. All well and good, except for the fact that Flash could not make the days that Bonnie could due to work commitments that could not change at short notice. But more importantly, the work in the bedroom which had spread to the kitchen has now spread to the dining room due to some unexpected structural issues. Namely that the floor to the bathroom (above the dining room) was balanced on beams that were not properly tied in to the frame, and could have fallen in at any time. So the job we thought could be finished by last weekend is now carrying on for another couple of weeks and what with the dust/tools/rubble everywhere there is no way we could get the house any where near ready for a visit this week. Here it is partially restored, but still propped.

This means that we may not get a visit as they have another family to visit and may not want this family to have to wait another 2 weeks for our visit before they get an answer. One part of me is gutted as I am really smitten with this littleun, but the other, more fatalistic part of me is saying, what happens does so for a reason and if it is not meant to be it is because this was not the right child. I suppose there is always the chance that they don't choose the other family after the visit, but I am not counting on that.

Bonnie says we should keep looking while she is away - the mags come out next week and if we see any potential children we will be contacting their sw direct to start the information ball rolling.